Discovering Purposeful Relationships [Part 1]
Howdy Delights? Happy 1st of July…
I hope you’re having a wonderful day today? Finding that work/life balance can be difficult sometimes…(blogging should be a full-time job) Not to digress but it does help to strengthen certain skills (multitasking, time management, brainstorming, etc.).
To achieve success and discover purpose (In everything), first seek confirmation from God…(It’s not cliché, its necessary)…
So I saw a post about purposeful relationships months back and here we are. There’s this thing about most of the people who give advice to the public (about relationships or otherwise), they seldom take their own advice, it’s nature. It is probably because they posses the gift to convince people to do the right thing and lack that conviction for themselves because they need that conviction from someone else, let’s call it a pyramid of life (You do for others and others do for you).
Another thing to point out is, why most advice (again, about relationships or otherwise) online or in books do really seek to help, they only complicate things because no two relationships are the same considering that they involve different people and different circumstances.
Honestly, the best thing to do is to really understand your partner and learn to talk to each other, it’s that simple…Additionally, do not include third parties (that’s how things start to fall apart) because no one knows your partner or relationship better than you and you absolutely have no idea what is going on in your third party’s mind or what their motive is.
No one’s an expert on relationships or love, some are lucky (They get it on the first try), some aren’t. Some are smart (Cunning) and some just don’t get it. You know how no one can tell you how to live your life? yeah, that’s how relationships are, if you want it to work, you’ve actually got to work on it. It’s a 50/50 thing, he’s got to work and she’s got to work.
Moving on; Relationships form everyday, from platonic to romantic relationships and we forget certain things as we go into new relationships or we basically look for certain traits from previous relationships (Forgetting there was a reason it didn’t work the first time), or we search for or try to force things from other people’s relationships into ours without fully understanding that it will affect ours differently.
The first thing to understand is that relationships should be built on a solid foundation, not trust, not love, not looks or pros and cons (Those things can be broken and then everything crumbles), those things come after Christ. Most relationships fail because we forget that aside having a purposeful life, having a purposeful relationship is important as well.
A relationship should be entered into with a clear purpose and a clear goal (Why do I need a man/woman, what do I need in this relationship, how do we make it work, what’s in it for me, what’s in it for him/her, if things don’t work what’s the contingency plan?), establish communication, establish priorities, establish that the two parties are going into a relationship with the same goals, do not assume he/she gets it or should know what’s up or assume they have the same motives; communicate.
Understand that no matter how long you stay in a particular relationship, if it’s not meant to be, if you have different priorities, it won’t work…
Basically, to avoid failed relationships and wasted efforts and time (Believe me, time if absotively important) we need to go back to our roots, we need to take every initiative of a relationship to God in prayer first. I understand that most of us do not believe it works or are sceptical about how it will work but it does work. Once God is involved, He creates purpose in your relationship because he becomes the pillar holding y’all together and trust me, with a pillar like that, no hurricane can shake you…even if you do shake, he helps you find each other again.
When you think of love and of purposeful relationships, think of Jacob & Rachel and of Isaac & Rebekah from the bible. Before Jacob met Rachel, God revealed himself to him (Genesis 28: 12), sometimes you have to be in the right place at the right time for His divine intervention to manifest. Before Abraham’s servant met Rebekah, he prayed, he asked God for a proper revelation, a proper situation that would clearly reveal who Isaac’s rightful wife was (Genesis 24: 12), sometimes you need to tell Him what you want. You will not discover purpose if you are with the wrong partner, you need to ask Him to reveal your right partner to you, you need to re-establish your stand in Christ…He is the beginning and the end of everything, the bible says before you were formed, He knew your end from your beginning so trust Him; He won’t lead you astray…
Happy 1st of July y’all, have a wonderful day.